God's greatest commandments are about love—loving God and loving your neighbor… as yourself. We boldly share loving God and our neighbors … but the “as yourself” part hits differently. Those two words are not excluded from the commandments ….It means we’re commanded to love ourselves.
God’s commands are always given for flourishing—our own lives and our neighbor’s.
Obeying the command to love ourselves equips us to keep the companion command to love others.
Toni Morrison said,
“You are your best thing.”
I sometimes wonder if she wrote that after reading this passage.
We are taught to love our neighbor
….. as ourselves.
But what happens when we’ve forgotten how to love ourselves?
Self love is sacred and holy
When you get a glimmer and reminder to love yourself.
Yesterday, I was reminded of this in the most tender and unexpected way. During the children’s moment at worship, my Sistahfriend Rhonda asked the kids to say something they liked about themselves. One child said, “I taught myself how to read, and I love that.” Another said, “I am so sweet.” It was holy ground—watching children affirm themselves out loud, with joy and without hesitation. And in that sacred space, I was reminded: a child shall lead them (Isaiah 11:6). That same afternoon, I attended a tea with a message centered on sacred worth. Through stories, ministry, and presence, we were reminded again of the importance of loving ourselves. We were even given keepsake fans with the words, “You are sacred”—a simple but powerful affirmation to carry with us. Confirmation came—beautifully and unexpectedly—through children’s voices and sacred gatherings.
Self-love is not optional—it’s a spiritual act.
It’s not selfish—it’s sacred.
God is not calling us to pour from empty cups, but to love ourselves with grace, compassion, and truth—so we can love others fully. That means we speak life, even to ourselves.
We honor our worth.
We hold space for our mistakes and still affirm our being.
“Do not expect to receive the love from someone else you do not give to yourself… The light of love is always in us.”
And as bell hooks reminds us,
“Do not expect to receive the love from someone else you do not give to yourself… The light of love is always in us.”
We cannot wait on others to love us in ways we refuse to love ourselves.