Yesterday I woke up to morning covered in fog. It was so thick that I couldn’t see the end of my block. I mentally prepared for a slower drive and a delayed arrival. Fog distorts ,obscures and hides what usually is in plain view. I dreaded the fog, but I knew in order to do what I needed, I would have to venture out into the midst of it. It meant driving out even though I couldn’t see everything that was ahead of me. I remember learning to drive through foggy California days and being told to pace myself. My fog lights would allow me to see just what I needed, even if it wasn’t as far as I would like. It was a journey from light to light. Reaching the traffic light and paying attention to the lights in front and back of you. Even in the midst of the fog, there were lights. It was slower ride but I eventually reached my destination …. Even in the midst of the fog.
Have you ever woken up in a fog? A mind so clouded with unexpected stress. It is the kind of fog that temporarily distorts and obscures our view. It slows me down, but I know I have to go through it and can’t avoid it. Being in a fog can distract and maybe temporarily paralyze you and sometimes you don’t know how you will get through it. But even being in the midst of my fog, I experienced receiving just enough. I made it through by going from light to light. Being in the fog may have painfully slowed down my pace, but I got through. You can’t see the whole path but you survive by going from light to light. It’s like faith.
Making it to the light of being vulnerable enough to share with someone how I was feeling and a safe space to say aloud that I was stressed. Yes, pay attention when the helpers reach out for help. We are not called to be superwomen. That gave me the strength to get to the next light of those who prayed for me and didn’t have to know the details. That gave me the strength to make it to the next light of having a safe place to cry. That gave me the strength to get to the next light of people asking love language questions like “Are you eating?” Food is my love language.
This gave me the strength to get to the next light of sitting down and talking to a therapist … because yes, you can love Jesus , be in ministry and have regular appointments with a therapist.. all at the same time. (smile) And when I looked up, it was better …… but it was because of the lights that God strategically placed in the midst of my fog.
Psalm 23:4 reminds me that we are not alone in the fog. – “Even though I walk through the [sunless] [a]valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod [to protect] and Your staff [to guide], they comfort and console me.” It tells me that all of us at some point will have to go through foggy moments, that’s a normal situation. But we go through (However long it takes…..) the valley , we’re not meant to stay there and make it a permanent habitation. So I am grateful for the lights of love that comfort and console me in the midst of the fog.
This is what gives me the strength and drive to always offer light when my sisters are in the midst of their fog. We may not see everything, but sometimes God gives us just enough of what we need. We just move from light to light.
